Cereal

Today at school, we had to give a speech about if we were cereal, what kind of cereal we would be. I had a difficult time thinking of a cereal, considering all cereal to me is boring...of course I have exceptions. I picked frosted mini wheats, because you would think that the cereal is plain and boring, till you hit the frosting! Then it's a SHA-BAMMY right inside your mouth, just exploding with it's sugary awesomeness. When you don't think it could possibly get any better, it doesn't. You begin to notice that the flavor is the same boring square that you once knew, once upon a time. The rush of that memory is simply depressing to you, because it's now a reality in your mouth. While you have all these thoughts and emotions within yourself arguing with one another, you know that you should have trusted your instincts with this cereal. I related this cereal to myself, saying how I'm an individual that people usually steer away from, then the sweetness of my kindness hits them, and it's so amazing. Finally, they hit the rough side, the gross parts of my personality...and they know they should have trusted their instincts. I was so nervous that I made it sound way more depressing than I just described it...I even said that I didn't really care about people, and because of that one phrase, my friends ignored me for the day. I'm used to that though, despite all the things I've done for them, because of one thing I've said...they shut me out, as they shut down. When looking back at this experience, I should have went with my first cereal...my favorite cereal, cheerios. The description is within the very word, so I don't have to explain, you just have to think about it. That's just how life is though...you sometimes say things differently, than you should. Maybe you even view yourself in a black and white mirror, whatever it is...life will always be different; I just wish people could be a little different. So do something different! Be different, think differently, if you're looking for something new! If you tired, then go for a run! If you're bored, go entertain someone. Just DO SOMETHING. I did something different today, and that's waking up at 5:30 a.m., and went for a two mile run (it was more like a dying jog). I actually started last Thursday...but today was different, because I was given the opportunity to watch the sun rise. It was almost like it smiled at me, as it came up...adding frosting to my life, and making my day just a little sweeter.

BEGIN SOMETHING NEW TODAY.

Perfect Life

There's so many concepts of what life should be, these days. What makes people happy, and what doesn't. It's all around you! Advertisement when you go to the store, on signs, on the t.v.,  when you listen to the radio, movies, magazines, books, music, and so much more! The media tells us how our lives SHOULD be, or how we should want them anyway. To the world, a perfect life is played out like this; be beautiful, be rich, do anything you want, have life handed to you, and so on. There are many things that society tells us to do, or what family persuades us to do, "get into business, or get into college. Do you want to be a burger flipper?" To shorten things up, people are dream killers. Life can be extraordinary, or the worst thing you'll ever have on your plate. Why does life have to be so cut and dry? It doesn't, because it's your life, and you can do anything you please. As long as what you please isn't terrible. It's like the saying, "freedom is free, until it isn't." I wish that school would teach people about life, and it does in a way...it teaches us that life sucks, unless you're involved. So get involved in life! Someone needs to teach people coping skills, because that really would have helped if I knew that earlier in life. We just need the determination and will power to continue life with a smile and laughter in our souls. Listen to this song for motivation, it sure helps me when I'm not feeling good. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHvgAJe8bvM&ob=av2n

What is a perfect life, in the eyes of Emily? A large house, to fill up with kids (and so my mom could visit), a giant yard, for gardening and hide and go seek, a room for art, writing, reading and so much more, and a place where it wasn't so dry. A husband to smile at me, when I looked into his eyes. To have children, so I could teach them what I know. Friends, to share my crazy stories with. A world where there was time in a day for sky gazing, and star staring. I don't really ask much out of my life, and it isn't unobtainable, so I'll have that perfect life one day. I know it will have fights and yelling, because that's just how life is.


BEGIN SOMETHING NEW TODAY.

Dreams

This actually isn't something that I thought would come up (considering my actual dreams at night are usual nightmares), but I think it's relevant to what's going on lately. What's going on? I'm about to start my senior year on Thursday. What does this have to do with dreams? It has everything to do with dreams, actually. I'm a person who has high expectations in life...and so I always want live to have life a certain way. Life isn't like that though, and that's why I love art so much. I love art, because despite the fact that your life may suck, and there's nothing you can do about it...you can make your own world. You can create anything you want, ANYTHING. It becomes real, something you can show to the world, even if everyone might not like what they see. I'm starting to realize something though, and that is this. Art is all about feeling, the more you made that person feel, whether it was positive or negative, you made them feel SOMETHING. When you give someone a strong feeling, they're bound to remember, and that's the gift that I have. My art isn't dull, or something that can be forgotten.  I have people telling me about art that I had done in the past, that I don't even remember doing in the first place. (I'm not saying I'm great, I definitely have room for improvement) This is where the problem comes in...what do I aspire to do with my life? I want to help someone, I'm tired of listening to people's problems, and not knowing what to say, or not knowing what to do. I want to create something great, that will change lives. I don't want to be remembered, but I do want my work to be remembered. I want people to remember what I did, because there will be physical evidence of what I did in my life.Who do I want to be, or to become? What do I want to do? No matter what I choose to do, because I live in a small town, people will try everything to drag me down with them. I'm a great person, I know that I am. Some of the things that I do, amaze me. I could let my mind wander, and work all day on a yard. Make it look amazing at the end of that day, and not remember that I did any of it. Same with art, music, or anything I do. I'm writing this blog for you, YES! YOU! That person, that I may not even know, that's reading the words I write. What do you want to do with your life? You don't have to tell me, this is where you think. Who do you want to be? To become? I want to be a mother, a wife, and have children. If nothing else, I want to impact the lives of children that aren't even born yet...my future kids. Because kids in general just annoy me, but they're still people, and people are great creatures.

Don't you wish that your life could be like the movie "Limitless"? Where all the main character had to do to change his crap of an excuse life was to take a pill. A magical pill, that wouldn't make everything better, but he was given the knowledge to know how to make things better. (Reminds me of the story of Nephi, how he asked the Lord for strength to break the physical bands, which held him down, instead of asking him to loose the bands)  I remember he said "Why is it that whenever your life exceeds your wildest dreams, there's a knife at your back?" Later he asks "Is it worth the risk? What would you do?" To me, it's worth the risk, because I would rather die great, than to die a nobody. Maybe that's why I'm so outspoken, and say so much! I want someone to hear what I have to say. Not necessarily that the words are coming from my mouth, but because I want to say something great.

BEGIN SOMETHING NEW TODAY.

Problems

Yeah, problems...everyone has them, but the funny little thing about life is this; almost everyone seems to think that they're the only ones with problems, or that their problems are greater than yours. You know exactly what I'm talking about! The friend who just complains about their lives to you, and expects you to listen every single time. It's okay if you don't pay attention, I do the same thing! It's really easy to do actually, just make sure you listen to every other word, or the last couple sentences. What will you do while you're NOT paying attention? The sky is your limit children! If you're someone imaginative (such as myself), then all you have to do is imagine you're somewhere more amazing than where you are at that moment. It could be a world of gumdrops, and sunshine! Where the sky is touchable, and it feels great! Or it could just be that same spot, minus the person talking to you at the moment. Usually, what I do, I simply start doing something else, if I really don't like that person. "Oh, I have this art ... thing I really have to get to", or I don't even SAY anything, I just start DOING something. AVOID EYE CONTACT. If you look into their eyes, they'll think you care about their problems. I have problems with keeping eye contact in the first place, even if I care immensely for that person...so this is a conundrum for me anyway.

One day, I strive to help people with their problems (psychology/art therapy), the only difference is ...I'll be getting paid. It sounds terrible, I know. I actually do care a lot about people, and will always put down my life, for the sake of someone else. It's amazing the lengths I go through, just to see someone smile or laugh. The depressing thing about getting older, is it get's more difficult to achieve this "simple", goal. Thank goodness I have a natural gift with knowing what makes someone feel happy. So when this day comes, I'll help someone with their problems, and they'll  not remember the things I said to them. You're probably thinking "well that's a terrible thing..." I don't think so, because they'll remember how I made them feel, and hopefully I made them feel great about themselves, and they'll have a brighter outlook on their life, and hopefully touch the lives of those around them. If I can JUST do that, I'll change the world one day, through some small, butterfly effect.